Sometimes you just get surprised

Some of us spend a lot of effort trying to control each day. We have calendars, schedules, notes, plans - all sorts of aids that help us keep ourselves 'organised'.  A few of us are very good in sticking to the schedule, a few of us do not care, the rest just makes as good job as possible, sometimes being more and sometimes being less successful. Nevertheless, there seems to be a universal belief in the society that one needs to be organised in order to be successful.

And so we enter into a race against ourselves - the goal is to be hyper-organised, to be in full control, to fit in more work, more activities, more sleep, more... and more... and more....

And then the 'surprise' happens.

Because we cannot control the external world, things happen there without our control. And we need to respond to such 'surprises'.  There unexpected occurrences may be good (all of a sudden your child was rewarded as a top student and has been invited to a great university with a phenomenal scholarship - yes, he or she had been working hard to get there, but this just exceeds all expectations you may have had), or bad (you wake up and there is a message on your phone from your child, sent in the middle of the night, saying that they have just developed a vision problem).

The good ones are easier to handle that the bad ones, that's obvious. But both need a response. First thing is that you may react (shout, cry, laugh)  - you need to make sure that the reaction is safe, that it does not cause damage to yourself or others. If you have just earned from your boss that you were missed for promotions, you have the right to be sad, resentful, angry, demotivated - but there is no point giving negative comments to your boss, this will not help. Similarly, if you win a lottery, you can be the happiest person in the world, but this is not a reason to quit your job run immediately and spend the money impulsively.

There are smaller surprises that happen throughout the day. Your calendar gets piled up with conflicting tasks at work, and you feel stressed. Or a meeting is rescheduled, and all of a sudden you have been granted extra time in the day. Or anything else you may think of.

The key is to be prepared for such surprises - just expect that they  will happen. You can prevent them as much as you can (if you keep your car well maintained, there is less chance that it will break - but it can and will break one day). You can prepare for such surprises appropriately (because your car may break at any time, would you decide not to go for a trip to another city? No. The chance is relatively low, and you arrange for breakdown coverage with your insurance or someone else, and if your car breaks, you will get the assistance. Yes, your day will likely be ruined, but that's calculated risk).

The other important thing is to respond to the surprise. OK, you caught a flat tyre in the middle of nowhere. You can swear to yourself (reaction), but it will not help. You need to think for a moment what is the best thing to do: can you change the wheel yourself? Ask someone for help? Call for breakdown assistance? What are the risk and consequences of each action? Do not rush into action immediately, think first - if there is time to think.

There are also times when it is better to choose not to act. When? When you are provoked. When someone wants you to act in the way that is not in your best interest. Well, not acting is another conscious response.

There are times when there is no time to think. In such situations your subconscious may know better what to do.  If you see a little child on a bicycle going straight onto a busy road, there is no time to think. Delaying the action will not help. In such case, follow your instincts.

Surprises will happen. We do not know when and what, but they will happen. Do not be afraid. Be ready.